literature

04 - Chikara

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"Save… me…" I pleaded, "Save… me… Umi…"

And right after that, I widened my eyes in pure surprise.
As Umi emerged from one of the puddles water upon the ground just behind Mamoru.

Unlike usual, her expression is strangely cold.
It shows no mercy.
It reminds me of the first time meeting her.

Mamoru noticed my sight has been shifted to something else.
And he widened his eyes as well.
Because when he shifted his sight, Umi's already in front of him.
Piercing his chest with her hand.
The same way like she pierced my chest before.

Almost in an instant, I could breathe.
Because of the sudden attack, Mamoru lost his focus and let me go.
I fell to the ground upon my knees.
Taking a moment to calm myself, before gazing forward.

Mamoru's standing upon his feet.
Lines of blood trickling down from his mouth.
Umi's standing in front of him.
Her hand's pierced through his chest.

"Mi-Mizuchi… you…"

Umi doesn't reply.
As she pulled out her hand from Mamoru's chest.
And placing it upon one of his shoulders.
Before smashing him to the ground, head first.

Mamoru gave a growl of pain.
Trying his best to resist and fight Umi back.
Only to have his effort end in vain.
As Umi repeatedly slamming his body to the ground as if he's nothing at all.

"S-Stop it, Umi!" I shouted.

Umi didn't reply.
But she shifted her sight towards me.
It's still cold.
It shows no mercy.
As if telling me that she's doing what she has to do.

"That's enough! Stop it, Umi!!" I repeated.

Umi narrowed her eyes.
Before shifting her sight towards Mamoru once again.

"If you go any further than that, you'll kill him! I don't want that to happen!"

Ever so slowly, Umi pulled back.
Taking a moment before straightening herself.
Giving a small sigh as she gazed at Mamoru.
Before eventually making her way towards me.

Umi doesn't say anything as she walked.
But she stopped when she's right beside me.
I honestly don't know of what to say to her.
So I remained silent.

"Don't think of lonely things like 'I care more about you than myself'."

I closed my eyes.

It mustn't be hard for someone like Umi to guess what I'm actually thinking.
But it's not like I regret thinking like that.

Umi saved my life.
And in turn, I'm responsible for her for the rest of my life.
It's just natural for me to think like that.

I placed a hand around my throat.
Before gazing towards Mamoru who's now sitting upon the ground.
The both of us are drenched because of the rain.
But it doesn't seem like we really care about that.

I didn't say anything.
As I made my way towards him.
Eventually stopping when I'm right in front of him.
And extended a hand.

Mamoru gazed at my hand.
I know that he's in disbelief.
Not to mention that he's healing the wound upon his chest as well.
It was the wound given by Umi when she pierced through his chest to free me.

But much to my surprise, Mamoru laughed.

Mamoru placed a hand to his forehead and shook his head.
"I really didn't expect for you to actually offering help to me after what I did!"

I didn't say anything.
But I smiled a bit when he took my hand and pulled himself up.
Cracking his neck several times.
As he continued, "Something good actually happened, huh?"

I didn't reply.

"Despite the fact that you're a Gyuuki, it's unmistakable that you're controlling it well."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I have to admit that you're quite an extraordinary person, Shinki."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Controlling Gyuuki isn't a feat that could be achieved by just anybody, you know."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"But still, I have a question."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Why did you stop the Mizuchi?"

I didn't answer.
In fact, I don't know how to answer that.
I remained silent as I gazed down.

"And from what she said, I heard that you need to care more about yourself rather than her."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Does that mean that you're the selfless type?"
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"That you don't mind sacrificing yourself for the sake of other people?"

I gazed up at Mamoru.
"It's not 'other people'…"

And I could see Mamoru arching his eyebrow.

"It's not 'other people'… it's Umi."

Chikara



"I owe Umi a lot of things."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"If it's for her sake, I don't mind to lie."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"If it's for her sake, I don't mind if I look like as if I'm using her for my own benefits."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I owe her a lot of things."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Things I'll never be able to repay."

I gave a small sigh.
Before gazing up at Mamoru.
As I spoke, "Mamoru… you're the good guy in this, aren't you?"

Mamoru didn't answer.

"If you say that containing the Gyuuki is evil, then I will shoulder the burden of that evil."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"But I can't let you kill me."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I can't let you endanger Umi's life."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"You can use me anyway you want, but I won't allow you to kill me."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Even if it means calling Umi again just for the sake of saving me."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"Or even if it means using releasing the Gyuuki inside of me."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I won't allow you to kill me."

Mamoru didn't answer.
And I notice that his expression doesn't change even the slightest bit.

"If you say doing something like this is evil… I don't mind being evil."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I don't mind being hunted by a Tochigami like you."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I don't mind being the worst kind of person."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I know that I'm weak, but as long as I could protect Umi, it's fine for me."

I remained silent after that.
Gazing down as well and ignoring the rain for the moment.
Before I heard a sigh coming from Mamoru.
As it resulted me to look at him.

"I told you, right? That I have my own principle?" Mamoru suddenly spoke, "My principle is that I won't let anyone who wreaked havoc inside of the area where I'm reigning get away, no matter who they are and what they are."

I didn't reply.

"And you have your own principle as well," Mamoru continued, "And it explained quite well of why you didn't fight back at all and instead relying upon the Mizuchi to help you."

I didn't reply.

"You said that you're going to protect her, yet you're using her to protect your own self, isn't that ironic?" he continued, "How do you expect to protect her when you can't even protect yourself?"

I didn't reply.

"Do you think that taking all the blame while keeping her ignorant of what's actually happening could be considered as protecting her?" he continued, "Do you honestly think that using your own body as a sandbag for people who might be after you and her would really solve the problem?"

I didn't reply.

"You can't expect to protect her when you can't even protect yourself," Mamoru sighed, "The only thing that you could do is getting better and getting stronger if you're really willing to protect her."

I didn't reply.

"If I ask you than between the protector and the one being protected, which one worth more, you'd probably say that the one being protected worth more," he continued again, "But let me tell you that they have equal value. For the one being protected must be thinking of protecting the protector as well."

I didn't reply.

"It's not something as selfish as one-sided feelings," he continued, "It must be mutual for something like that to actually work."

I remained silent.

"Well, that's the lesson for the two of us here."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I'm not someone so selfish that I won't admit that I lost in this fight."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"I'll end this end with just a lecture today."
". . . . . . . . . . ."
"And I'll let everything that happened up until now slide."

And I widened my eyes a bit.
As I could hear Mamoru chuckling.
As he added, "You're great, Shinki. I lost."

I widened my eyes in surprise.

"I'll drop by to your Shrine from time to time and I expect by that time, we could get along well," Mamoru continued, "Since I told you that I'm just doing what I have to do, I hope that you'd bear no personal grudge against me."

I remained silent.

"In a way, I suppose I could say that I'm quite similar to you," he chuckled again, "If it's to protect the area where I reign, I don't mind being called evil."

I didn't reply.

"You're taking care of the Mizuchi as well, aren't you?" he added, "Since you're living with her, I expect you to keep a watch on her as well as yourself. If something were to happen, don't hesitate to ask me for help as well. I'm the Tochigami of this city so there must be something that I could do."

I didn't reply.

"Once again, I have no personal grudge against you, Shinki. Since I'm just doing what I have to do," Mamoru continued with a sigh, "I won't ask you to bear no personal grudge against me, but I do hope that after this, we could get along well since I'll be keeping an eye on both you and Mizuchi as well."

I didn't reply.

"Since I'm the Tochigami of this city, it's just natural for me to help those living inside of it, right?" he continued with a chuckle, "Thanks to you now I realize that violence doesn't always solve the problem. No matter how old you are, it's never too late to learn something new."

I didn't reply.
And Mamoru just chuckled again as he walked past me.
I turned around as my sight follows his steps.

"Ah, it's really unlike me, acting all softie like this. I'm usually easy-going on the outside and serious on the inside, but it became the other way around this time," Mamoru said as he scratched the back of his head with one hand, "For some reason, I feel pathetic. But at the same time, I feel like I've accomplished something as well."

Mamoru then turn around.
I could see a smile upon his feature.
As he joined both hands together.
And closing his eyes as he bowed, "Goodbye."
© 2012 - 2024 AitoYuuki
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